Khalid al-Qishtini خالد القشطيني

Khalid al-Kishtini, a prominent Iraqi writer in the al-Sharq al-Awsat newspaper, has recently started a blog. It seems he is keeping this blog to publish the naughty bits that can't make the cut. I would've published this entirely in Arabic but he has one English entry (which is quite interesting), so maybe he'll be bilingual.

مدونة للكاتب العراقي المعروف خالد القشطيني و الذي يكتب يوميا في جريدة الشرق الأوسط, قد يتفاجئ الزوار بمحتوى المدونة - تبدو المدونة مخصصة للطرائف التي لا يمكن نشرها في الشرق الأوسط و سرعان ما يتضح ان هذا يندرج تحت عنوان واحد ألا و هو "الجنس" فيبدو ان القشطيني عابث و ماجن شأنه شأن اي أديب ذو بنان ولكن لا ريب ان المقالات لا تزال مصبوغة بأسلوب القشطيني الذي يمكن وصفه باللطيف الرصين فهو لا يعرف الإبتكار المجنون حتى في مجونه هذا...فعلى سبيل المثال:

كنت مع رهط من الشباب في مقهى دينوس بلندن عندما وقع نظري في ايام دراسة الرسم على فتاة حسناء من ويلز. استهوتني بجمالها وتقاطيع وجهها فدعوتها الى البيت لأرسمها. ادركت ما وراء الأكمة فاعتذرت و قالت ، يمكنك ان ترسمني هنا في المقهى اذا شئت. نفضتيدي من الموضوع. دفعت عنها فاتورة القهوة و انصرفت. بعد بضعة ايام استلمت هذه القصيدة من احد الحاضرين لم اعد اتذكر اسمه و قد ارخ فيها تاريخ الواقعة ، إذ قال
لفاتنة من البيض الحسان
من الولش الغواني لست تدري
بهن المحصنات من الزواني
"هلمي ارسمنك غدا." فقالت
غداة غد ، و في المقهى الفلان
فقال: بمرسمي حيث استتمت
زيوت الرسم و الورق الثخان
فقالت لا و من اعطاك عقلا
و علمك التحايل في البيان
اداة الرسم تحملها سلاحا
على فخذيك مشحوذ السنان
و لكن كل ما تبغيه مني
خلوع الثوب عن ذاك المكان

Irregular Blogs : Saddam Hussein's Nephew

The son of Saddam Hussein's sister and former bodyguard, Al-Hussein Arshad Yassin writes omewhat irregularly on, as expected, his blog is very defensive of Uncle and Uncle's policies regarding several topics, including Iraqi Jews :

Now we come to the part where you are all waiting for. So how did Saddam Hussein defend Iraqi Jews? In the year 1992 there was nothing left of Iraqi Jews only 40 families refusing to leave the country. In the year 1992 a Palestinian Muslim threw 2 grenades on a Jewish synagogue in Baghdad killing 2 Jews and one Muslim (the synagogue’s guard). The Palestinian was put on trial and was sentenced to death. My uncle Saddam Hussein (my mother’s brother) gave a speech on TV. I was only 8 years old at the time and I remember nothing of this accident but today I asked my father to tell me what really happened since my father was my uncle’s head of security and bodyguard for 27 years from 1968 after leaving Najaf (where he use to study in the Hawza) till 1995 where he retired. My dad remembers this speech very well, he told me; your uncle went on TV and addressed this speech to the Palestinians living in Iraq saying that any Palestinian holding a grudge on Jews I ask him to leave the country an do his business in Palestinian. I will refuse to let people make out of Iraq a field of personal vendettas. And these Jews are Iraqi in the first place and they are under the protection of the Iraqi government because they are Iraqis and they hold the Iraqi nationality and they have the rights like any Iraqi. Any Palestinian wishing to make a show of his muscles and manhood let him go to Palestinian and make his killing there and not killing Iraqi Jews that have not harmed anyone and have not harmed any Palestinian living in Iraq.

Meanwhile, Iraqi Ghost, a teenage Iraqi boy wrestles with his Iraqi identity (irregularly as well).