Still alive

Two blogs of the same author:
How to deserve it? I don't know how, just trying to figure out.
My letters to America.

Found them while reading the comments at 24 steps to liberty.

What does it mean to have a second chance?
It happened to me. I want to deserve it. I want to make this one work.
To do that, I need to see what inside me in a mirror. This blog is not for anyone to read, why would someone care about my daily illusions, feelings and thoughts. I will put some of my old diaries too. It is my footprints in life, so when I mess it up again or give up I find a STOP sign turn my head to see the route I chose and know where to go . This time I will live a real life, this time when the day come and I hear that voice again " that's it, your time is over" I wont say "not now !" I wont say "I haven't lived yet!" ... or scream "not like this!!!I don't wont to die like this ! None on earth deserve to die like this".... Next time I die, it will be peaceful and easy...no matter what, there will be no regret.

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